Torn.

She wants to hear those words which he never says.Usually, never.And all she always wonders is,will it ever become usual or even start to become usual or will it always remain ” never” as usual !?
She is waiting for a love that would never fail to excite her.She is not scouring places in search of him,but it is a quiet faith that he exists. But she is confused. Is he “him” or he or may be he ?Her heart would know better. And when she questions her heart she realizes,there’s someone there she cannot feel sober with .Or even around him. And his eyes. The look in them. Her eyes notice more in them than he might really want to show. But why should she melt into pieces at that and why the hell are butterflies dancing in her belly ! Is that a gleam in her eyes ? And wait ,why does a sudden bout of fear and doubt cloud her sheen? She has been struggling with the key for a long time now but may be she is knocking it against the wrong door . Why can’t she simply figure it out!? What’s all this mess ! She does not yet know who but she truly believes someone surely will sweep that away and her off her feet ! But she can’t endlessly wait for him. She doesn’t want him to reveal himself at the end. She wants that love. And the earlier the better. So that she can live her whole life with that love and reminisce some beautiful memories at the end. Yes! That is exactly she wants. A memory lane. A beautiful one at that! Filled with love and laughter.
The real confusion is ,so many stories can be spun and everytime the universe plays a trick on her, she ends up falling for it.And a unique story pops up.Love stories ,they say. But possibly how many times can love repeat itself!? Does it even stay “the” love the next time the cosmos play her cards? Or is this new feeling the  true love that she has been seeking forever and the former was just some random shit that can be phased out? Umm,no. She respects her first love, her true love.
Hmm.
Sadly all she knows is ,she’s trying too hard to defend the first one in the name of love by keeping everything wired and under control while the second is coming swashing at her at such breakneck speeds that all inhibitions shall break loose.

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